Note: This is NOT to be taken seriously, and is only for fun.
Double Standard
Starring LAINY, Brain Stormer, Uncle Che, David Funk
Narrator: LAINY is well-known around the blogging community for her writing skills and friendly attitude. She lives in the Philippines and has been in a relationship for three years on-line. It was supposed to be a time where they celebrated their third anniversary together on their Journey to Forever. She was recently named as one of the inductees into the WBE Blog of Fame class. But one night changed her life forever....
(Police knock on the door)
(LAINY is sleeping)
Police: Open up!
LAINY: Who is it?!
Narrator: Not knowing what was happening, LAINY answers the door without any idea her life had just changed at that moment.
LAINY: What's going on here?!
Police: Ma'm, we're here with a search warrant to your place.
(An officer hands her the warrant)
LAINY: What is this about?!?!
(Officers come back with a bag containing an unknown product)
Police: LAINY, you're under arrest for possession of Blog Enhancing Drugs.
LAINY: Can you please not arrest me in front of my dog Ewoks?! Jeez, not in front of him!
Police: You have the right to remain silent.....(finishing the arresting procedure)
(LAINY is shown behind bars hiding her face)
Prison mate: Whatta ya in for?
LAINY: Blog Enhancement Drug Possession and Use.
Prison mate: WTH is that?
LAINY: If I really had those pills on me, I would show you right now.
Prison mate: Huh?
LAINY: Yeah, those "blog rages" can make me naughty naughty!
Narrator: During a scheduled badminton game behind bars, LAINY decides she's about to get even. She has no idea that a prison guard is on her side.
Brain Stormer: I know what happened?
LAINY: WHAT?!?!
Brain Stormer: I know you didn't possess BEDs.
LAINY: Who are you?!
Brain Stormer: Let's just say I'm someone that knows more about what's going on than you do. Finish your game, and be ready to get out of here.
(Brain Stormer is seen walking away as LAINY finishes her game of badminton with her prison mates)
(Brain Stormer gathers the prison guards around to talk to them)
Brain Stormer: Have you guys heard of BEDminton?
Guard: You mean badminton? That's what they're playing out there now.
Brain Stormer: No, I mean BEDminton. It's too explicit to talk about here, but I'll show you my reply to a blog about it in my office.
(Suddenly, no guards are seen watching the prison yard)
(LAINY is seen leaving and escaping the prison as a car pulls up)
Some of the prisoners: Hey, where are you going?!?!
Uncle Che: Get in, LAINY!
LAINY: Uncle Che! How did you....
Uncle Che: Would you just get in the car!!!
(LAINY gets in the car)
(LAINY and Uncle Che are on the road now)
Uncle Che: Whoever did this set you up good!
LAINY: How did you know I would be escaping?
Uncle Che: Brain Stormer told me.
Narrator: LAINY is now on a mission to find out who put her behind bars.
(LAINY is in a hotel and she checks in at the desk only for her to contact the police)
(Someone knocks on LAINY's hotel door)
(LAINY pulls out her badminton racket)
(LAINY looks out the window and the person has a suit on with his back turned towards the door)
(LAINY opens the door and swings the racket as hard as she can towards the person knocking him to the ground)
(The person she knocked to the ground is David Funk)
(David is shown trying to protect himself from LAINY swinging the racket)
(LAINY suddenly stops to see that it is her blogging friend David that she hit with the racket)
LAINY: OMG! David, I'm so sorry!
David Funk: Is this how you treat all your guests?
LAINY: Are you alright?! David, I'm really sorry!
David Funk: Brain Stormer and Uncle Che told me I could find you here. But at this rate, I may not be able to think clearly with you swinging that damn racket at me like that!!
LAINY: I said I was sorry!
David: Yeah, I really should revoke your induction to the WBE Blog of Fame for that!
LAINY: It's not like nothing else hasn't been taken away from me!
David: You're right. Well, I came here after Brain Stormer and Uncle Che told me what happened. I don't know who set you up, but it's up to you to find out. I'll hold off the induction for as long as I can, but I can't keep this quiet for long so you better find out who did this!
(Police arrive as they pull up to the hotel)
David: Go LAINY! Take this with you!
(David hands her a disk)
LAINY: WHAT?! What is this?!
David: Get out of here now! Find a computer to look at it! Trust me! They will put you in prison for life here and not back home! GO!
(LAINY goes to leave, but an officer stops her)
Officer: Where do you think you're going?!
LAINY: Home!
Officer: Oh yeah. How are you going to do that behind bars?
(LAINY uses that badminton racket to knock down the officer)
LAINY: And now you can put me behind bars for hitting you with a racket! That's if you can catch me!
(LAINY runs off)
(LAINY finds evidence of other bloggers using BEDs, and searches at the library for those involved. She comes to find out that those guys had their cases dismissed because their blogs were terrible and that they were anonymously abusive, too. And they were under the same unidentified web-hosting.)
LAINY: These guys are just jealous, and want a good blogger out of the way so they can shine! What a bunch of hypocrites that exist! They let these abusers go, but I get charged with BED use?!
Narrator: Will LAINY uncover the truth? Or does the writing she reads from those bloggers hide a bigger story that is covered up by a major blog/website media outlet?
(LAINY is shown running as an unidentified man looks over her confidential and Top Secret files at a desk)
Man: I think we underestimated her!
Sometimes, writing a blog can blind you from the truth!
Academy award nominee actress LAINY stars in the box office smash Double Standard! Coming to theaters April 1!
64 comments:
=-O =-O =-O =-O =-O
whew! ate lainy in da house! :* :* :* :*
:* :* :* :*
Hi David! :)
boooooooooooohoooooooooooo! this is the 4th post W that i owe from u! promise to respond to all of this later today..coz today last exam for the week (take note, just for this week..hehehe!) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
FC 1, SDWHH! :* :* :*
You have no idea how much you owe me! You better read them all or you'll suffer the consequences! Oh, and you better pass that last exam first!!! ;) ;) ;)
Thanks for adding the sound effects to LAINY's movie! :* :* :*
FC 2, Mon! :* :* :*
Hi Mon! ;) :)
=-O =-O =-O =-O
oh dear... Lainy's in trouble...haha.. cant wait for the movie David...heheh
;) ;) ;) ;)
FC 3, LJ! :* :* :*
Lainy in da house!!! 8-) 8-) 8-)
Yeah, this is her most controversial role ever! Thanks for adding the music to LAINY's film! ;) :)
Indeed Lainy is in the da house! Thanks for adding pictures to her film! 8-) 8-) 8-)
This is going to be another block buster hit D. I think you will be on the next Golden Globe Awards for this one. ;)
That would be nice to get a Golden Globes Award for this! I think you did a great job with casting for this film(you're listed in the credits in case you didn't know). ;) :)
Wow i dont know how i missed that maybe because i am not used to seeing my name in lights LOL . Thanks ;) ;)
Bill, it's all good. I'll have to see about assembling a crew to get you in your own movie then. :-D :-D
:) :) :) :) :)
Oh no! Oh yes! Hahahaha!
Now I don't know what to say!
Well, whoever the culprit is, they certainly can't put an innocent blogger like me behind bars! O:-) O:-) O:-) O:-) I will make them pay for it! It was the most terrible experience I ever had!
Now David, I've got to thank you for coming to the rescue. But I am sorry if I hit you with my racket, LOL! I just had no choice ;-)
Seriously, you had me laughing so hard out here my stomach aches, haha! Even Ewoks was involved, LOL! And Brain Stormer (my anonymous friend, hehe) and yes! Uncle Che too and the rest of the gang in Malaysia (Mon, LJ, GP, Ane) and yeah! The soon-to-be M.D Gagay! And of course Bill! I thank them all for helping you out in its quick release. I wasn't expecting it could be this quick. I hope I still have the time to promote it so that we hit the box office.
Thanks for directing and writing my movie. Had it not been for your creativity and magnificent skills, it wouldn't come out as beautiful as this :-)
Just because of Blog Enhancing Drugs? LoL. Great story, David. I hope Lainy can uncover the truth :D
LOL! I hope Lainy will able tosolve this mystery hehehe. sounds like burn notice. I though she got arrested for possession of pretty face that cause chaos to all the abu sayaf in gen san hehe just kidding. great movie DavidF block buster! and I will nominate you for best writer on blogging red carpet award lol.
;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
:) :) :) :) :)
;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
Hi Lainy! :* :* :*
They did actually put you behind bars. You should make them pay for it more than I had to when you struck me with that badminton racket! I understand protecting yourself, but now I may have to list myself on the Blogger Injury Report on a day-by-day basis! :-D :-D :-D
Yeah, the cast was great, and Bill deserves credit for putting a good one together. Production crews with the names mentioned in the credits don't get much better than that. I was especially pleased to see Gagay handling the sound effects because her >:o >:o >:o certainly gets the attention of everybody! :-D :-D
And that's the least you can do is promote this film considering I was hurt on the set during the scene when you swung the racket! Didn't you hear "Cut!" before you really hit me in the head?! :-D :-D
I'm glad it didn't impair my writing according to you though. Thanks for the comment! ;) :)
Yeah tripzibit, that's what she went to jail for? Hard to believe, huh? Truth be told, I should have had stricter drug testing policies for blog enhancers before hiring Lainy to act in this film. LOL! :-D :-D :-D :-D
Hi Shydub! ;) :)
I guess in some ways is like Burn Notice.:)
Lainy could very well be arrested for having a very pretty face because I think many would place her behind bars for that. But I have a feeling they would try to pin her for some kind of blog crime.
Thanks for the comment my friend! ;) :)
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
Another *** post and I missed it. >:o >:o >:o >:o
OMG my full name is here!!! GG!!!!! =-O =-O =-O =-O =-O
Oooooh sounds like an exciting movie, I can't wait! :-D :-D :-D :-D
Lucky uncle Che was around to rescue Lainy...like he always does! Hey Uncle Che! :* :* :* :*
I am thrilled to be the emoticon designer for this fantastic show, enjoy peeps! :* :* :* :* :*
I am thrilled to be the emoticon designer for this fantastic show, enjoy peeps! :* :* :* :* :*
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
It's okay, Mariuca. :)
Mariuca, I actually seen your name on Associated Content when you signed up. I do like both the names though. ;) :)
Yeah, the cast and crew assembled for this movie is as good as it gets! :* :* :*
Yeah, Uncle Che played an important role in the making of this film. ;) :)
Mariuca, you are the best with emoticons, and I'm glad you worked out a deal to be one in this movie. I'm glad audiences could understand how mad I was when Lainy hit me with that badminton racket with your use of that angry emoticon! The DVD will reveal how she kept going on that scene when she was supposed to cut. :-D :-D :-D
W! sorry again! urgh. can i just have all these an overtime work/read over the week end? got darn busy during weekdays.. ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
i know u love me, lol! :-P :-P :-P :-P
Of course, but you're really testing my patience! :-P :-P :-P
I'll tell you what, you don't read them over the weekend, you can expect the most imaginable thing to happen on this blog for you if it doesn't happen! :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P :-P
LOL David! I love it! :) So very creative! :)
You go Lainy, knock those creeps out with your badminton racket!! :-D LOL
I can't wait to read the rest!! :)
me? pictures?? *DONT_KNOW* *DONT_KNOW* *DONT_KNOW* :-D :-D :-D
This is amazing...
Thanks Ane! :) :)
Ane, Lainy is very dangerous with a badminton racket! :-D :-D
:) :)
Yes Mon, you were in charge of pictures for this movie. You're listed in the credits for the movie poster for a reason. :-D :-D :-D
Thanks Uncle Che! You did a splendid job as a supporting actor in this movie! :-D :-D :-D
grrrr...do u still love me? :'( :'( :'(
just done reading this 1! :-P
and yeah, i love it when te lainy smashed u with her racket..haha! do it more te lainy!i am supportingu..hahah..u want me to help u?LOL! :-P
I still love you sweetie! :* :* :*
Cool! :) ;)
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